Welcome to the. Place. Where I try to. Conjure. Up a software engineering principle. That's inherently anti-clean by accepting and internalizing the. Omnipresent chaos.
Of the universe fnord and as. A result of this crazy. Show of nothing. But jokes and metajokes and. All kinds of random stuff that is related. (Or not; i don't actually care too much about.
The accuracy and stuff.) to discordianism or. Things that are not discordianism but you know what. I forgot what. I was. Going to write. After I've decided to do this π bullshit.
So just wing it. You got nothing to lose or. Gain anyway.
Read this. (← this is a link! it won't bite you so feel free to click!!)
(this is bad. i'm running out of jokes (jokes? are you sure those are jokes? as in they're supposed to be actually funny?) and shock-inducing gimmicks. welp, let's see what i can come up with...)
Fnord. Fnord. Fnord. Fnord. Fnord.
[You can't just repeat the word "fnord" five times and call that a Discordian joke mate, it doesn't work that way. -- K]
Screw you, this is my place, and I will fnord whatever I wanna fnord. -- SRH
Someone (that doesn't exist (but probably will after I made this webpage available to the public)): Your opinion is shit because it doesn't scale.
- At least I'm willing to admit it if my opinion won't scale up; those software aRcHiTeCtS high up in the sky won't be as friendly as yours truly when you told them their opinion won't scale down.
- Also- "scale" you say? Do I look like lizard people to you? (Haha get it? Because it's "scale" as in scales on the skin of fishes and reptiles. Yeah okay I know it's not funny shut up)
No, because this isn't Clean Code or Agile or whatever, this is not written so that newly-minted developers could dogmatically follow, this is not written so that those first-world dwelling "tech" hipster fvcks could diarrhea out a truck load of shitty turtorials so that the former group of unassuming fools could pay their unassuming $5 or whatever price a month for a fvcking subscription, this is written as a joke, it was meant to agitate your brain so that you could think for yourself for once. Guys - I have no intention to become a snake oil merchant. I have no snakes, I don't breed snakes, and I don't plan on making oil out of snakes. Please don't accuse me of something I'm not doing.
Alright alright, here's the serious version if you want a serious version of an inherently not-so-serious thing...
- Intent-oriented action: whatever you do should reflect your intent (or motive, or whichever word that's applicable under concerned context). Just like magick (yes that's the correct spelling for the supernatural kind of magic), you have to put in your intention for it to actually work. Try to prevent anything that doesn't serve your intent. 2024.1.5 Addendum: Remember: Anything that does not directly serve your intent is a compromise, and a good part of compromises are bullshit.
- Re-design over refactor: what's the difference? Refactor is solely a code thing, while re-design is a mental process that acts upon concepts and it could be carried out as a refactoring, a rewriting or something else. Or to put it this way: re-design is re-thinking, while refactor is re-doing. Way too many people confuse these two way too often, and there's way too little re-thinking being done in everywhere.
- Intent-artifact counterposition: no matter what you do, you must know there's a difference between these two and methods & solutions for one realm cannot be expected (as in "you cannot rely on the fact that it is true and proven") to work in the other realm. Some people say that if your code is somehow "good enough" you don't need to write documentation; this is wrong because code is artifact and artifact is not guaranteed to (and often doesn't) reflect the intent. Do not trust these people. Remember: design is intent but code is artifact (UML is also artifact no matter what the UML apologists say), specification is intent but tests are artifacts.
These three are the absolute basics that all self-proclaimed Code Discordianism practitioners should adhere to. There are also some other principles that, while being enlightening (in my opinion), aren't necessarily as important as the ones listed above.
Think metaphysically, m y f r i e n d ~