This short story is technically a spiritual successor to the one I've written two years before I started this one. I indeed have been editing it in the last 5 years, and now, I've had enough. It certainly feels strange; as I've implied elsewhere, publishing anything you wrote online - especially the ones you wrote when you were a teenager - can lead to bad optics, but I suppose there's a mental limit of how long one can be held back from releasing their creation to the public for anyone who tries to write stories.

This is partially written to fulfill a promise with Mislanka Nova; years ago I told him (her? them?) I shall write again, thus write again I shall, no matter how bad the end result would be. Further than this, I shall make no promises; I've got about two stories inside me (one is yuri and one is not), once they're out, I might be officially done. Nova, on the other hand, is the one who can truly write, at least I sincerely believe so. I haven't read anything new from them since 2018 (I believe they said they were reserving them for actual publications) and I have no way to know if they did write anything new; but if they're still writing new stores, I don't need to read the new stuff, the fact that they're still writing alone is enough to keep me happy; that's how much faith I have in them. Now that I'm about to give this long overdue thing to them; how would they react, and how would they judge? Would they cherish it like a old long-lost friend, or would they simply toss it away, like what I would've done to that dainty gift from that toddler? I choose not to care about such things. Christian teachings does sometimes put your mind at ease - you simply do things and leave the judgement to God.

As for the story itself: Feng Yongze does not exist; he's merely a character I've made up. Shao Dong, however, is real, is indeed a high school friend of mine, and we indeed did have meals together, not once but multiple times; it's just that "Shaodong" is actually his first name (with a different character for "Shao"). Other than that, everything about this story is fiction.

I wish I don't have to comment on Anna in public. What happened between me and her is a sin that I must fully bear on my own.

2024.11.23
Dublin, Ireland